Lessons Every Child Needs to Learn, and How to Teach Them There are certain lessons that will serve every child well to have learned by the time they are an adult. The younger your child can learn these lessons, the better prepared they will be for life and all it brings their way. There are so many qualities that a child must learn to become a mature adult, so take each opportunity to help your child learn whatever they can from any situation in their life. Situations will come our way often, and these lessons are there to help us grow to become more well-rounded and useful individuals. You as a parent can use these as opportunities to guide your child in their personal journey to become useful to themselves and others. Respect This is one of life’s most important lessons. Respect is basically treating others as you would like to be treated. Without this quality, a child will find life to be very difficult. Respect will assist your child now because adults will view your child more favourably if your child displays this quality. Although adults should live in a way that commands instead of demands respect, many also expect it to be shown by children. Your child will be given more opportunities if they are viewed to be a respectful child. As an adult, your child will flourish in their personal and business relationships, and will avoid trouble with the law. The best way a parent can teach their child this crucial quality is to live in this manner themselves. Respect the people around you and don’t talk down about other individuals. Respect your child, which gives them the self-acceptance needed to grow in this quality, and lets them experience being on the receiving end of respect. Flexibility A quality that will help make life more bearable is to learn flexibility. This is the trait of learning to go with the flow, and not letting the little things bring you stress. A child who learns flexibility will not get wrapped up in anxiety every time plans change, as they so often do. As an adult, flexibility will make your child a better employee, parent and partner who doesn’t demand rigid adherence to previous plans. A great way to teach your child flexibility is for them to learn that it is acceptable to make changes to a plan when necessary. Keep a loose routine, because routine is beneficial to one’s health, but do make small changes every now and then. Find a way to make up for anything that your child feels they are missing out on through the last-minute routine changes, as this teaches them that change doesn’t necessarily mean they will lose anything long term. Teachability One of the greatest hindrances to any individual’s personal growth is a lack of teachability. Teachability ensures that we are always willing to learn, and that we are open to advice. Learning this quality as a young child will help them learn how to facilitate their own personal growth. As an adult, this openness will draw the assistance of others who are willing to share what they have learned. Parents can help their children become teachable by talking about why it is important to learn from others. Discuss how it is a privilege to receive advice. Talk to your child about how there will be times when they do not appreciate the tone the advice is given in, or other factors such as the individual delivering the advice. Despite how difficult it can be to receive correction from someone, talk about how we can each make it our goal to take away at least one beneficial thing from every conversation. Integrity Integrity includes the important trait of honesty, keeping one’s word and being dependable. Integrity is a quality that becomes a way in which you are known as a person. An individual with integrity is someone who can be trusted always, whose word is never questioned, and who is known as someone with a high code of moral conduct. Even children who display integrity are known for having this quality, and children who don't show this quality find it difficult to convince anyone to trust them. When your child becomes an adult, he (or she) will find integrity to be a key value that will unlock doors in the business sector and in his personal life, as people treasure this quality that he holds. A way that you can show your child how to live with integrity, is to live with integrity yourself. Keep your promises, and do what you say you will do. Be honest, and never make your child feel that they need to doubt what you have told them. Determination Determination is the quality of sticking to one’s purpose even when it becomes difficult. It is a quality that will help your child to continue with the task at hand, whether it be in school or learning one of many things as they grow. Determination will help your child succeed when they are taking the steps to accomplish a big task. Determination is a quality that will help your child as an adult to succeed when others all around them are failing. When things get tough, the individual who has determination will surpass all others in their field. Teach determination to your children by encouraging them when they fail, and by motivating them to keep going. It is easier to be determined when you have a cheerleader by your side, reminding you of your strong points and telling you that you can do it. Be that cheerleader for your child. Tolerance Tolerance is such an important quality for each and every person. It is being kind to others and accepting their differences. Because we are all unique, a part of every relationship is tolerance. If you can point this out to your child, he will have an easier time learning the value of it. Being tolerant as a child will make it easier for your child to make friends, and it will make him a better friend. As an adult it will open doors in both the work and personal arenas. Being tolerant builds self-esteem in others, which comes back indirectly to you as a better world emerges for everyone. You can teach tolerance to your child by being accepting of the differences you see in others, and verbalizing this to your child as the opportunity arises. Tolerance is a beautiful thing because it shows concern and empathy for everyone. It also builds a caring nature in the individual who practices it. Self-Acceptance Another branch of tolerance is self-acceptance. Self-acceptance is loving and valuing yourself, and treating yourself with care and compassion. It is imperative that an individual accepts themselves in order to be at harmony with themselves and the world around them. Compassion helps children form their world view with love towards themselves, which is the basis to seeing value both in themselves and others. As an adult, self-acceptance will give an individual the drive to keep on going even when things get tough, and to never give up on themselves. You can help form your child’s self-acceptance even as a newborn, by answering their cries immediately, and comforting them instead of leaving them alone. This builds self-esteem and self-acceptance in the baby because they learn that they are inherently valuable and worthy of being cared for. As your child grows, always give them your time, and make eye contact when they are speaking with you. Speak gently, never harshly to your child. Consequences Consequences can be good or bad, but in either case this is an important lesson for a child to learn. Consequences are basically the outcome of one’s decision. Good decisions generally result in good consequences, and bad decisions generally result in bad consequences. It is important for children to know about this, because it helps give them motivation to behave respectfully. As adults, it is a good principle to know because it is how the world generally works, and learning this lesson when young helps an individual to figure out the world in a less frustrating way. Teaching consequences is a natural means of discipline. If a child disobeys your request not to throw his special ceramic toy around, it may end up broken as a result. Or you may choose to implement a consequence such as removing the toy in order to make sure it doesn’t get broken. When your child has obeyed your request, he will find that he is given more privileges because he has shown himself to be trustworthy. Teaching consequences will help your child live well for a lifetime. Compassion What good is unlimited knowledge without compassion? Compassion is seeing yourself through the eyes of another, and caring for them as though you are personally involved in their situation. Compassion will help your child to reach out to those who need encouragement and love. When your child becomes an adult, their compassion will give them the ability to change the world, even a little bit at a time. We can best teach our children to be compassionate by being compassionate ourselves. Explain to your child the importance of compassion while you live the example for them. As you take the opportunity to extend a helping hand to those in need of it, speak with your children about why you are making the choice to help and to care. This will give your child both the example and the understanding. Enthusiasm This quality turns an ordinary person into an extraordinary one. It is being excited and interested in the people and situations around you. Enthusiasm makes others feel great about themselves, and makes you stand out in a crowd. Enthusiasm will make your child naturally feel good about learning, and it will help them to be open to grasping new concepts. As an adult, it will put them into positions in life that they may not have gotten into had they been sullen and grumpy. Teach your child enthusiasm by being enthusiastic about the things that are important to them. This shows them how good it feels to have someone interested in one’s personal endeavours, and they will naturally want to spread this feeling to others. Show enthusiasm whenever you are learning something new, either alone or together with your child. Be enthusiastic about all of life, in both the easy and difficult times. This will help your child realize that sometimes being enthusiastic is a choice, and that it is a choice that can affect their outlook even when a situation is difficult. Courage Courage is not the absence of fear, but strength in the face of that fear. Courage will keep your child moving forward and not surrender to doubt and cowardice. As an adult, courage will give him the ability to succeed despite any concerns or pain that might otherwise be a stumbling block to his success. It is an essential lesson to learn while growing up, as it offers the lifelong benefits of strengthened self-esteem, and many others. Inspire your child by reading stories about individuals who displayed courage in the face of opposition. Give your child heroes to look up to, whose strength was this quality. Introduce them to friends and family for whom courage is a strong point. Point out the courage that your child displays, as this will build up a belief in his own courage and strengthen his perspective about his own abilities. Boundaries Boundaries are a very important part of life. They give us the ability to say “no” when necessary. Without boundaries, we could be used or taken advantage of. An individual who cannot draw healthy boundaries is a danger to themselves. Learning the lesson of boundaries is important for a child because it will give them the confidence to resist when they are being pressured to engage in dangerous activities with friends, or when unsafe adults try to trample their boundaries. Setting boundaries as an adult will help your child to maintain mutually beneficial friendships where they are not being used, and will help them to avoid personal burnout - whether it be physical or emotional. Teach your child boundaries first and foremost by respecting theirs. It is not easy to hear the word “no” from your child, but it is part of how they form their boundaries with other people. Help them learn ways to say it to you respectfully, but give them the opportunity to say it, and to make their own choices as often as possible. Let your child hear you say “no” to other people when you are asked to do something you don’t have the time or energy for. Example is the best teacher. Commitment Commitment means keeping the promises you made long after you lose the feeling of inspiration you had when you made the promise in the first place. Commitment is what gives you a reputation of being true to your word, and it is a huge part of being dependable and trustworthy. When you take commitment seriously, you make the world a better place for everyone around you. Commitment will help your child be a valuable team player in regards to any group they are part of, and will set the stage to give them the practice of being a committed adult. As an adult, commitment will give your child the integrity necessary to keep their promises even when they no longer want to. It will make them a better partner, parent, employee, employer and friend. It will put them a step above the rest of the individuals around them. Teach your child commitment by encouraging them to stick with their decisions. If your child has signed up for a season of basketball, encourage them not to drop out unless a serious reason permits it. Set the example of a committed person by not dropping out of your own responsibilities. Set this example, especially in your relationship with your child. If you promise your child an ice cream, make sure you keep the promise. If you promise to be at their big game or recital, be there. Conclusion There are many lessons that are valuable to a child as they grow up. The ones listed above serve as a great start in preparing a child to be a healthy adult, and a valuable member of society. Teach these lessons with love, and in the best interest of your child. Model each of these lessons, for they mean nothing if we do not hold ourselves to the same standard. As it is said, practice what you preach. Parenting a child and giving them all the lessons they need to live a good life is not an easy task, but it can be done. Start with this list and add on to your child’s life education as you see fit. Your hard work will not go unrewarded. You will be pleased to someday see your child loving themselves, and working hard to serve both themselves and those around them. These life lessons will go a long way in making the world a better place.